Anu mam, my wife and I have been married for 18 months. I have always grown up around girls. My best friends are girls, one is married, another is single. I have two sisters, one elder, one younger, who is not married and lives with us. She is in college and financially dependent on me. Two of my closest friends from office are also women, and nothing's ever happened between us. But now, my wife says it's inappropriate to chat with girls. If I am late from work, or stay up late replying to texts, she accuses me of hiding things but it's not true. The first time she got suspicious, I gave her my password, and even showed her my chat history, but it seems, it's not enough for her to trust. She says if I love her, I should choose her over 'outsiders.' How is this fair? I feel suffocated already. Will this marriage work?

Dear LG, Please don't disclose my name. I don't want to share my personal problems with others. I am 45 years old, married 13 years ago; my wife's age is now 38 years. I got two kids. My wife is pretty (she takes lot of care for her beauty) and I want to live simple. I kept faith on my wife so I didn't interfere in her life. From last four years, I am staying away from family (because of work I have shifted to other city, monthly once I go back , purchase everything, give money for expense and return to job). She keeps her mobile with security. Once, by mistake, I read her WhatsApp message. One of her office client was praising her pics and she was responding to him. So I told her, be official, don't entertain, if they fall behind you and we may face problem. She agreed but is doing the same thing and deleting his messages. Then I wanted to see what all things she does in WhatsApp. So her link I shared in my mobile and started reading her messages. She use to chat with one married person from last three years, she changed his name in her mobile and kept his wife's name. Three years back he proposed her with love song. My wife used to support him, sometimes she used to delete the messages. He knows all my family history. Whenever they get time, they used to talk each other in phone. Some messages I read, they were planning to meet also. She always come home very late, I didn't question her because I kept faith, but as I told you I have two kids in home. If she comes late, they are facing a problem (they stay alone until she comes back). Simultaneously she is chatting with another married friend. She says he is like a brother in front of me, but that person says baby, darling, dear, love, etc, in his conversation and forwarded some love songs and calling her for long drive. My wife replied some other day we will go. He replies, You always says same thing. I will become old one day. Then I was surprised and guided my wife indirectly. I told, don't entertain any person they may start to trouble you or if anybody troubling you please tell I will help you. We got two kids so we got lot of responsibility. She got a clue that I am reading her messages, so immediately she deleted all messages and after some days she deleted their numbers, along with that she deleted some other numbers also!  Why, I don't know. Once I told my son, beware, I can track you and tell where are you going and what are you doing. But from that day onwards, my wife is blocking her internet at 6 pm (when her office closes) and unblocking when she returns home. I am worried regarding this behaviour. I have stopped reading her messages now. But now I am feeling very uncomfortable because her behaviour is very soft with me, (previously she was very aggressive, she used to fight with me unnecessarily.) Please guide me how to handle the situation. What can I do now? Sometimes I feel I should leave everything go somewhere or is it a punishment for marrying a pretty girl? What to do? Please guide how handle the situation. Regards.

I have been married for 2 months now. before marriage, we met twice and only spoke on the phone mostly. During the talking phase, my now wife told me that she did not have any past and has hardly any male friends and has always been away from dating apps. However, after we got married I came to know she has been using dating apps like tinder,bumble,etc for years and was even involved with men in the past. One of such relationships continued till just few days before we started talking. She always seems to be lying and hiding when confronted about it. She always comes up with generic responses like she does not remember , she dont know or it was a normal thing , etc. this has led to arguments and I have found it extremely difficult to reason with her. This is going to an extent that sometimes it makes me think If i have made a correct decision about my marriage or not. Please let me know how do you see this situation.

Hi.. good evening.. i want your advise.. we are married for 6 months now and we had a arranged marriage. My mistake was not informing my wife about my past relationship which we had broken up badly and immediately after my marriage my ex girlfriend shared our pictures with my wife purposefully and she got upset with that and me and my family convinced my wife that i have broken up with her and i dont have any contact with her and it is true and i am loyal to my wife. Everthing was normal after that and 2 months passed and i observed that my wife is in regular contact with a guy on phone whom she calls friend and talks to him daily. I confronted this to her and she told that he is just her freind and he had helped her before during her difficult times. Again this continued and i asked her to stop contacting him daily and even though he is a friend what is the point in talking to him daily and she just cried telling that i am controlling her and she feels like she has no freedom and is in jail and i am not allowing her to talk to her friends. After this she limited her talks with him and seemed fine by me as it is just a friendly casual talks 2 to 3 times a week. One day she asked me reply to one of her emails and wanted to upload some file. While i went to upload i had access to her google photos and i was shell shocked to see lots of photos of her with this guy whom she calls friend and in close proximity. Also there are pictures of them dated 3 to 4 years back and also the most hurting part is the pictures of her with him after our marriage as well. She had told me that they have a college get together and reunion and she had went with him on that day and stayed overnight as well. I was literally shocked by this and confronted her immediately and then she told me that she was in relationship with him and her parents did not agree so couldnt marry him and even he also cancelled many marriage proposals because of her and she betrayed him and happily married now with me while he is still not married and she feels guilty as all this happened to him because of her and so she talks to him daily and she can only feel ok once he is married. I told her she has to stop talking to him if we want to keep this marriage.. she tells me if i leave her she is dead as even her parents wont accpet her and also he (her ex boyfriend) will not accept her and she says she has nowhere else to go.. she still cares for me though but i dont know what else to do.. she still talks to him 2 to 3 times a week... please advise how to go about this

hi I am a 38 year old guy happily married & have a 7yr old girl. My marriage had been pinch perfect in every sense. My wife is very loving, caring, always with me during crisis be it financial/ medical or emotional & my kid added the remaining stars to my happy life. I had a love marriage with my wife in 2013, we were in same office in 2010 where we met. It wasn't love at first sight, for 6 months we just had normal interaction like normal colleague, it was when she came in my team, we spent more time & fell for each other. Before taking any relationship any further, she enquired a 100 time if I didn't had any girlfriend before ( I didn't) & also confirmed from her that she didn't had any relationship in past. Infact, we started our relationship once we were completely sure that we are going to marry in future which we did. Before starting our relationship, she did told me that she wasn't a virgin as she broke her hymen by herself some time back (self enjoying). I completely trusted her as she had told me almost everything about her life & she didn't had any relationships & I found it a bit natural. We are quiet open with each other & dont hide any whatsapp/ mails etc with each other, they are always logged in in our laptops. 3 months back we had a fight due to some issue, I was working on my laptop where her gmail was signed in ( I use that a lot for my business as well). I looked at the chats link & found some chats of her with myself & a lot of friends. I enjoyed reading it, specially the part where we started dating. I didn't consider it as privacy interreference as we both were like open book. Suddenly I found a chat with one of her family friend in which there were lot of conversations like, tum meri jaan ho, I love you, Kiss you, aaj mil nahi paaye accha nahi laga, dono akele movie chalte hai etc etc from my wife side & that guy side. The guy was there family friend & was married, she used to roam a lot with him due to work ( atleast what I believed so before) & was very open with him. I didn't mind as I always expected them working together before they had fight due to some financial transactions. Now, I look back she was always with a guy whom she loved, not virgin & all my world just crashed down. It seems that I have been cheated from very starting from the very 1st hug to 1st kiss & 1st everything that I always considered was 1st for both of us & now feeling a lot of betrayal from the person I trusted the most in my entire life. I confronted her, she changed her statements everytime. 1st she said, her brother told her to talk to that person with love as there some money on hold ( not sure what else he would have told her to do), than she said thank god you found out, else I would have died in pain, saying she had a crush on him ( I found luv u & kiss u chats from both sides), then she said that he even try to ruin his married life due to her which his mother stopped & her mother stopped to take it further & several other reasons. But she has the stand that nothing happen physically, not even a touch. It's very hard for me to believe as I have always considered her to be completely truthful, honest & was sure I know everything. This incident felt me being betrayed & I am unable to trust her anymore. I still love her & we have our ever loving daughter but our marriage is no longer as it was before & slowly slowly its drifting apart as my behaviour has changed, I am getting anxieties remembering these again & again, I am unable to watch romantic movies ( which I liked before as I always used to imagine us) now I imagine her with someone that married guy, be it romantic movies, songs, even the dreams are terrifying. I cry a lot going to washroom or going to balcony at night but still am not able to maintain the same balance that we had before. Even she is trying to bring happiness like before but my thinking is completely changed. It's somehow effecting the kid as well as we don't speak with each other like we used to before & the kid understands there is an issue. We know we will save our marriage, but we don't want that. We want our life the same as it was 3 months back, not sure how to do that. Please advise.